How to Show Up Powerfully
Have you ever felt that changing the way you speak, the way you dress or find yourself making up stories to feel less inadequate in your interactions with others? You are, in effect, trying to mold yourself into someone you thought they either wanted you to be or have them validate your worth.
You mute your delivery out of fear of being misjudged or having to be the unpopular spoken opinion in the room. You play it safe.
As a result, a less powerful version of yourself shows up. I understand that there’s value in being aware of our audience, but I would be inclined to say how often we make assumptions about our audience that are wrong.
These same assumptions lead us to show up differently, less authentic therefore less powerful.
So, if you want things to change, you must choose to do it differently.
The details of people around us won’t change, but how we choose to show up can. I recently needed to remind myself of that. I could never control or change how people behave, react, or show up if I was honest with myself. But I can only control how I show up within a situation.
It has nothing at all to do with being the most liked, the loudest voice, or taking more space for speaking. Showing up powerfully is about making choices that align with who you are, what lights you up from inside, brings you joy, and supports you in living consciously.
A mentor recently reminded me that I couldn’t fix or save everything. The situation sometimes calls for me to stand down and remain on the sidelines as events unfold. Because the only way out is the way through, at first, we don’t always see it that way.
We rush to either resist, hide, avoid, or numb from difficult emotions or conflict, whether personally or professionally. Most of us are not reasonably equipped to handle the waves, the highs, the lows, or the depth.
What is the solution?
You Name it:
In what scenario do you show up as a muted version of yourself?
Is it when you are in a meeting, networking event, family gathering, new situation, or a significant life-changing decision or discussion? What’s in for you to stay silenced? What are you gaining? What are you losing in the process?
Get Clear on your Values:
What are your values? What matters to you the most? What can and can’t you live with? A list of the qualities that need to be present to live your best, most authentic, fulfilling, and joyful life. What are those values that help support you in living in harmony, calmness, and peace of mind? When I think about my values, they are ownership, inclusive, fairness, resilience, hope, faith, joy, efficiency, getting out of my comfort zone, family, and mindfulness.
What are yours?
Use your Values List as a Tool:
I recommend capturing your values List or manifesto where you can see it as a reminder for when you are in these situations. Maybe in a notebook, a journal, or printed and framed on your desk or plain post-it note on your mirror where you can see it daily. I know you probably think this sounds crazy, but it works. Try it before you resist it.
Let your values list or manifest serve as a reminder for you to go into a situation. Refer to your list and acknowledge the values you honor when you choose to show up powerfully in the situation.
What do you notice?
It’s about choosing to get out of your way, so you can influence, lead, or live with more impact as a participant rather than a consumer.
No regrets or judgment:
Once you decide that showing up powerfully is what brings joy and lights you up, you will need to step into your power. As life will continue to throw curveballs your way, showing up powerfully becomes the pathway to making more decisions from a place of “being” instead of “doing.”
This truth is not necessarily easy, but a change mindset and daily practice will help you hone the path of least resistance. As a result, you become more self-aware and will be making decisions that align with what you believe to be authentic and truthful to who you are as a human being. Eliminating regrets, judgment, or looking back in the past ruminating on “should’ve, could’ve statement” but instead finding courage, ownership, and acceptance of all parts of yourself, the good and flawed parts of oneself.
Final Thoughts:
Frankly, you can never control how your actions will land, interpret, or how people will respond, but you can control how you feel and why you choose to own your power and take action.
When you ground yourself in your values, you can trust that showing up powerfully is simply in line with who you are authentically.
