Warning Signs of Bullies and Bad Bosses

The primary reason people leave a job is either a mismatch in culture or a boss who drives them up the wall. You’ll never know exactly what it will be like to work for your potential boss until you have the job. Sometimes, you might not even meet your hiring manager until your first day. Hopefully, we can help by looking at clues that may help you gather as much information as possible.

Do:

• Pay attention to how the manager treats you throughout the interview process
• Research the manager, and if possible, find former employees to ask for their perspective
• Request (if possible) to meet with potential colleagues and your potential boss

Don’t:

• Ignore your gut instincts about the manager as you go through the interview process
• Ask direct questions about leadership style — you’re unlikely to get an honest answer, and they might signal that you don’t want the job
• Neglect to look up your potential boss’s social media profiles

Signs and Red Flags to Pay Attention to:

• Pronouns Matter: Don’t expect the boss to be a mentor if your interviewer uses the term ‘you’ in communicating negative information–such as, ‘You will deal with a lot of ambiguity.’ If the boss chooses the word ‘I’ to describe the department’s success, that’s a red flag. If the interviewer says ‘we’ regarding a particular challenge the team or company faced, it may indicate that they deflect responsibility and places blame.”
• The Boss Asks Inappropriate Questions: Do you have children? Would your partner be ok with the hours required to do the job? Any questions geared toward revealing your age or religion, etc.?
• The Boss Lacks Enthusiasm: You should feel excited when you consider working for them. But if you feel like the boss hates their job and doesn’t care, leave immediately. Chances are that the office is full of disengaged employees plagued by low morale.
• Extreme Friendliness: “It may sound odd, but what should have tipped me off was how nice she was,” one administrative assistant says of her toxic boss. Adults don’t want to work for a nice boss. It was a trap I could’ve easily avoided had I caught on earlier.”
• Self-Absorption: “If his ideas seem to be more important than finding out about your ideas, or if you provide an answer and the interviewer tells you you’re wrong or interrupts with his answer to the question, it may be an indication that he will be difficult to work with,” notes one technical support staffer.
• Fear Used as a Motivator: Be wary if the response identifies a lack of respect for people. When managers disrespect and distrust others’ motivations, they resort to extrinsic means to motivate, such as threats, public humiliation, and comments about layoffs.
• Defensive Body Language: Watch for constant shifting, avoiding eye contact, or rifling through papers as you talk.
• Visual Cues: If your boss scans you from head to waist versus waist to head as they extend their hand in greeting you, they are intuitively sending a message that you are smaller than they are
• Disrespectful Behavior: Don’t overlook unprofessional behavior

Keep track of how long it takes for a boss to get back to you about the position or how long she waits to respond to your inquiries. If you’ve given up on a job, for example, because you haven’t heard a word in four weeks, you suddenly get a call with an offer, take time to think about the position, and review your initial gut responses. Bullies often torment their subordinates by making them wait and manage with a carrot-and-stick approach. While they may have been too busy to get back to you, this is a sign that you should pay attention.

• Verbal Abuse: Be alert during the interview to overly critical or snide remarks regarding your work experience, companies you worked at, and training on your resume. Also, take note of any offensive jokes that seem to be made at the expense of other employees.
• Intimidation: They use verbal or physical threats to ensure co-workers comply with their wishes. Their tone is overly powerful. Therefore, be alert to any statements, name-calling, or scathing criticism that might imply the boss is accustomed to using threatening gestures or words to control fellow employees.

Sabotaging employee reputations

To maintain control of employees and their futures, a bad boss might blame the employees for issues at work and refuse to let bygones be bygones. They might find ways to punish employees for issues over which employees have no control or refuse to recommend them for promotion, training, or transfer based on some long-ago mistake.

It’s essential to be aware of a boss who gossips about the work and personal lives of co-workers in ways that make employees appear to be unable to handle their responsibilities. Listen to how they describe the performance of your predecessor and if they give credit where it’s due, or they blame them for departmental or company issues. If you speak to co-works, ask questions to determine if the employees seem satisfied with the boss.

These are a few red flags to watch for during an interview. Throughout my career working for different industries, I experienced all the ones listed on this blog. I am the type of person who has been a people pleaser, which I believe is the downfall that led me to accept jobs that were not the right fit in the past. As I look back, there were warning signs all along; had I paid more attention to them and my gut feeling, it would have been avoided.

Taking the time to ask questions and prepare for an interview by searching the company or individual manager and trying to reach your network for any information could help. In the end, preparing for an interview with a plan to impress your potential employers so you can land the job is a one-sided mentality that will not help you succeed in choosing the right fit or longevity.

Safe to say, it took me painful experiences to realize landing a new job needs to work both ways; the potential employer is not just interviewing me, but I should also interview them. Whether the company or manager, during the interview process, both sides are selling themselves. Sometimes you are carried away with selling skill sets and impressing that you miss the crucial steps that benefit you in the long run.

Unfortunately lack of preparation or experience in the interview preparation, especially for people who have not been in a position often to look for a job. It’s guaranteed you will overlook those warning signs. The lesson learned here at the same time is understanding your values, skill sets, and talent will benefit you in the future from accepting the wrong jobs and roles, which could lead to walking out on the job within short few months.

My advice to my readers; take your time during the interview and waiting process. Pay close attention and don’t let external forces guide or rush your decisions. Whether enticing salary increase or status of title, there is always a ‘But‘ or a challenge behind the lucrative offer or how easy it was to land that dream job!